Steelers break the second commandment.

steelers gnome

2. You shall sell no knock-off merchandise on eBay, or any craptastic memorabilia which shares likeness to what is in SportsHeaven; you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For He, the Ditka, is a jealous coach turned sports-analyst on ESPN. You shall worship Ditka and only his commandments.

I’m all for supporting my DC area teams by buying a jersey here, or a t-shirt there, but Ditka wrote a list of nine commandments to govern fandom and we must live by them. These are our laws.

Winning six Super Bowls is quite the feat, one that should be celebrated, but why would the Steelers celebrate this by creating a six gnome set for it? This has to be one of the weirder things that I’ve seen in a long time (ever?) and I must enforce Ditkas laws of sports man.

Where do you put this monstrosity? Do you pet each gnome before every game for luck? Do you put them in your yard and yell at little kids that try to steal them because they have mind-controlling powers? I can’t answer these questions, but someone needs to for me. I expect something like this from a dedicated [sic] fan on eBay, but the official Steelers team store? C’mon.

Also offending the second commandment:

The official Steelers Forest Face. ugh.



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