Monday links: Pump up the volume.

In physics, can you hear this? Well then let me turn it up for you.

Ryan Zimmerman an All-Star – Every team has to have one, but Zimmerman worked his ass off to make it on the team, even though the Nationals have absolutely failed so far this season. Bravo to the former Wahoo. [DC Pro Sports Report]

Chase Daniel Plays Tour Guide (Also, Quarterback) – As a Mizzou student and a Redskins fan, it’s great to see one of the greatest players in Missouri history playing for my favorite professional team. Hellz yeah. [Redskins Blog]

Diagramming Sarah Palin’s “Full-Court Press” Metaphor – Just by putting this in my link-dump, Palin’s lawyers will probably come after me. [Deadspin]

Signature Calls: Buckhantz Talks “Dagger!” – Introducing the only reason I watch Wizards game. DAGGER! Too bad there’s no players on the damn team that can do it anymore. [DC Sports Bog]

College Football List Week: 5 Heisman Contenders – I honestly can’t wait for the new college football season to begin, but I swear to god if I see Tim Tebow’s name three more times, I’m gonna lose it. [The Big Lead]

TWENTY-FIVE-YEAR-OLD OUTFIELDER WANTS TO TELL MILWAUKEE BREWERS GENERAL MANAGER HOW TO DO HIS JOB – When you’re future franchise player calls out the GM on making trades, that GM should be worried about his job security. [The Sports Pig’s Blog]

Kal Penn Starts Work At White House – Geez, why can’t KUMAR have a more American name like… like… Barack Obama? [Huffington Post]

Seacrest out.